God's Hand

God does not call the qualified.

He qualifies the called.

I wake up every morning conscious of the fact that I am living a miracle. I am doing work that conventional wisdom would say that I am ill equipped to do. Autistic people are supposed to have no EQ. Yet, here I am, developing EQ.

See HERE.

Teaching My Son EQ
It started when I saw that my son needed EQ training. I saw so much of me in him and I wanted to save him the pain of rejection, the social ostracism, the social setbacks and the social opprobrium that I myself went through as a child and as a young adult. My efforts paid off. He became a skilled leader of people, and his leadership skills gained him many portfolio triumphs which opened the door to Cambridge University.

My health was poor so I decided to give children English Enrichment from home. It occupied my time and got me pocket money. Why not? Before long, a pattern of students emerged. Many gifted kids with poor social skills came to me, and stayed. Instead of just teaching them English, I found myself teaching them EQ. The centre processes and protocols evolved to include parent coaching and EQ development. Quite a few of these past students have become student leaders in secondary school.

Ignoring The Idea
Naturally, the idea came to set up an enrichment centre to develop EQ.

By then, the centre processes and protocols had become tried and tested. We knew how to get EQ results with strange misfits and children with anger issues. One such child punched his team mate in the stomach whilst discussing a comprehension question. Another child almost broke his pencil trying to control his rage. Yet another got into trouble in school for kicking at the throat of a classmate. Then, there was the one who threw a schoolroom table against the wall. All arrived, stayed and were very very sad when they had to leave my classes.

I had the idea for an EQ centre but I did not have the motivation. I liked working part-time and playing full-time (embroider, knit, garden and watch C-drama). I liked making a difference but not work too hard. I am in my 50s. What have I to prove? There is no more ambition and no more desire to strive. So, I did nothing about my idea.

The Husband normally ignores what I do. All he wants is a happy wife, clean house and successful kids. I was able to give him all 3 by working part-time to teach English with a dose of EQ. The man who calls me a buggeration (and cannot be bothered about what I do), dragged me to The Old Fire Station and half coaxed, half nagged and half bullied me to sign the lease.

Should I? Shouldn't I?
With the lease signed, I had to do something. So, whilst playing more than working, I managed to get the branding done, the renovations done, start marketing, and hire a staff. That alone took me about 8 months. Meanwhile, God provided amply. The revenue from English Enrichment sufficed to keep me comfortably in the black.

Then, came Covid19. I was no longer able to teach at home. So, with one pandemic, God forced me out of my home classes into my new premises at The Old Fire Station. Before long, it was time to move out of there because the Singapore Land Authority is taking back the whole premises.

So, God chased me out of The Old Fire Station.

My life had become so hectic that I considered pulling the brakes on it all. Why teach EQ? Why bother? Just go back to teaching English at home!

But oh dear.... dang it... I can't go back to teaching English at home because it is Covid19, and I cannot teach at home. Meanwhile, I have a whole bunch of students who think that Dr. Pet's class is their Happy Place. I cannot abandon them by closing shop entirely.

No choice. I could not move backwards. I had to advance.

God's Provision
So, I started to look for new premises to rent. One thing lead to another and we came across a shophouse selling well BELOW bank valuation. The discrepancy between the sale price of this shophouse compared to the neighbouring ones was so stark that I wondered if the unit might be haunted. I connected with 3 other property agent acquaintances and friends to find out if this unit or this area had an ugly secret that was upcoming.

Even more amazingly, this shophouse is fully tenanted upstairs (corporate residential lease) and downstairs (corporate commercial lease).

So, I bought the shophouse with my past years' earnings. The price was so good that it was a no brainer. The sellers are businessmen in need of cashflow. They need to cash out to fund their main business. I then rented a half shop a few doors down. The rental I collect from my tenants will cover the rent I owe my landlord, plus some.

By this time, I was on my knees in gratitude to God for providing:
- rental income to cover my higher business costs
- shop to buy
- shop to rent
... in a location that met every single one of Dr. Pet's stringent criteria.

It was almost as if God was telling me that all I needed to worry about was the job He wants me to do. He would provide the rest.

In Too Deep
So now, even after Covid19 is over, I can no longer move my operations back home. Partly, I now have a shop I own, and a shop I rent. Partly also, thanks to this whole thing, I realised that my clientele drive every weekend to me in District 27, from Districts 3, 10, 15, 18 and 19. Not a single one of my clients even live near me in District 27.

It makes sense to move my business nearer the parents who suffer a long journey every Saturday to my home. One of my clients lives in Pasir Ris. The parents do not drive. Their journey to my home (by bus) is 1.5 hrs ONE way. The Mama sent me her son for 2.5 years and next year, she will send me her daughter.

Pray In Tears
It was not until yesterday that I knelt to pray, in tears.

Thursday's class is an EQ class. Our marketing tagline for that class is, "We develop EQ." However, it seems to me that parents have read the tagline to mean, "We tame wild children." In this class alone, I have...

- kids who don't make eye contact.
- an aggressive bully.
- a child with anger issues.
- 2 children who cannot focus.
- 1 who whines.
- 1 who was so shy on Day 1 that he said nothing.
- 1 with sensory issues.
- 1 who kept interrupting me.
- 1 who was entirely passive.
- 1 who shut down and became non-responsive.

For the past 9 Thursdays, I woke up in the mornings and went, "Ohhhhh... I don't want to go to work today!"

Yesterday was Thursday.

Wild Angels
I started the class with a discussion on social distancing during playtime. They sat nicely in a circle and offered suggestions calmly. They took turns to speak. No one interrupted no one else. They disagreed calmly. When they disagreed, they offered new suggestions taking into consideration the other party's objections. They listened to each other.

The aggressive bully who, for 8 weeks, talked like a gangster and moved like a gangster, entered the class humble and gentle. When he pointed out a mistake that my facilitator had made in spelling someone's name, he did so very respectfully. The one with anger issues offered a few times to give way to another classmate. The very shy one spoke up. The whining one became angsty but when I patted his shoulder, he calmed down and his brain started working again.

My staff and I were round-eyed at the end of class. Huh? What just happened?

It was almost as if God was telling me that I don't even need to worry about how to do my job. He would help me there too.

So, when I came home, I went on my knees and thanked God for...
- picking me to do something an autistic person should never be able to do
- giving me the wisdom and the insight to do it with
- providing amply for my material needs so that I can focus
- giving me teachable moments to use in class
- giving me, Dr. Pet, painful learning moments to grow and develop in my confidence
- looking after every detail of my journey from when to move out of my home to when to buy a shophouse
- providing me the perfect staff to hire
- an everything else...

At times, I feel like a freeloader. I am not sure I do very much because God has done so much.